Make it Happen!

"Make it happen!"

There's something about that phrase uttered by many leaders over the years, both to a direct report and even proclaimed as a badge for who they are as leaders: "I'm a make-it-

happen kind of person!" We applaud it because that's the way things get done. But what if "make it happen" is not the best approach? What if waiting to see what materializes could be a better way to deal with your situation?

I've always been a "Make It Happen" leader, but I'm learning that can be downright dangerous.

When I'm asked a question, I tend to have a quick answer.

When I'm given a deadline, I'm always looking to beat it.

Bottom line: I don't like to wait... for anything.

But sometimes (actually most often), waiting is the wisest thing to do.

When you react instead of responding, you are letting your emotions run the show. A wise mentor once told me that reacting impulsively is bad nine out of ten times.

As a leader, when you are in such a hurry, you often miss the nuances of relationships, alternative options, and fresh opportunities—not to mention the chance to bring others along with you.

Reacting quickly to false accusations or defensively to attacks on one's character tends to validate the complaint.

You lose respect and trust when you force a decision before it's necessary or move ahead before there's team buy-in.

What often is created is what I call "False Urgency."

It most often shows up in leaders who don't pause and wait. 

We think that because the question was asked, it demands an answer now. We think that because the opportunity is in front of us, a decision is required now.

I'm learning that not every question demands an answer now, not every accusation calls for a response, and not every decision needs to be made yesterday.

SO WHY WAIT?

1. Waiting reduces the anxiety that tends to control us because we are "choosing" a wise response. This choice (which often feels out of reach amid anxiety) empowers us to consider carefully.

2. Waiting allows for wisdom. Wisdom is actual knowledge applied to life's circumstances. It isn't formed until it's practiced. When we react impulsively, we tend to use old, already embedded (and often broken) knowledge instead of fresh wisdom.

3. Waiting builds community. By simply pausing, we can enlist the wisdom of others, ensure our team is on board, and foster a healthy relational environment.

It's tough to wait in a Microwave Credit Card World, but it's in the waiting that wisdom shines and character is built.

It's in the waiting that we become Calm and Confident Leaders.